Don't Catch My Disease

Favorite daughter Brigid just returned from Girls State recently.  Like her brother when he went to Boys State five years ago, she was excited about the prospect of meeting new people and having some fun.  Well, she met new people.  That's it.  Ok, I am probably exaggerating.  She said it was a great experience.  She said that knowing what she knows now, she would recommend it to others.  She also said she has no desire to go back.   One of the reasons was the rules.  The other was that my sweet, intelligent daughter is catching my disease.

Let's talk about rules.  As an educator, I'm a huge fan of rules....well, procedures anyway.  Students need to know how to turn in papers, how to conduct research and the right way to collaborate.  All of that takes procedures and rules.  People who learn how to follow the rules when they're young, seem to do better with them when they become adults.  (Speeding aside, of course...that's one that trips me up all the time!)  That said, what is with those who feel the need to create rules just for rules sake.  Really?  Brig shared some of the rules of GS with me and I was surprised and a bit miffed for her.  The girls, at GIRLS STATE, in an all GIRL environment were not allowed off their dorm floor in running shorts...or shorts for that matter - even during their "free time".    They were to wear dresses the entire time.  Um, ok.    They were not allowed to use the restrooms between speakers.  Um, WHAT?  Finally, the one that really threw me was on the girls' last night, the floor Nazis, guards, monitors set their alarms to wake up every two hours to make sure the girls were not still up talking.  Seems there are motion sensor lights and if the girls even ventured into the other side of the suite the lights would come on.  If the "monitors" saw the lights on, the girls got into trouble.  Wow.    Brig was shocked.  So was I.  These girls are some of the best and brightest and they were treated like little kids.  This was nothing like the shorts, t-shirts, fun and late night conversations that her brother Conor experienced at Boys State.  They learned the same information.  They learned the same branches of the government.  But the experiences were vastly different. It seems to me that if you have a group of intelligent young ladies on the precipice of adulthood, that they ought to be treated as such. 

Disease.  The definition is simple- a disease is an ailment, a sickness or illness.  My daughter has caught mine. I guess you could call it "peoplephobia".  I'm not scared of them however, I just simply don't want to be around them.   I laughingly tell others that I don't "like people".  It usually gets a giggle or smirk because people think I am joking.   I'm not.  Truly, my intentions are good and interactions with people are genuine.  I can do the small talk thing with professionals to a certain degree and I love working with teachers in my district.  That's my job. But,  I can't stand the banal, humdrum sometimes cutthroat encounters that revolve around my kids' school functions.  This includes ball games, music concerts and other extracurricular events.  Wow.  Women, as a gender, are mean, gossipy, and snarky.  So are their husbands.  I choose not to interact.  I pack my iPad, full of games and good books, and a beverage sadly lacking in alcohol and head to the top of the bleachers.  There I park it, all by my lonesome and watch the game/activity.  I love it...because I'm alone.  I might venture over to talk briefly to others, but for the most part, I am blissfully unaware of the cutting remarks aimed at the players, coaches and teachers in the building.  Peace.   Ahhhh.....

The same is true about crowded functions.  I loathe them.  This includes but is not limited to trips to Walmart - must be the tenth circle of hell, the DMV, jury duty and huge church gatherings.  I recently traveled to Washington DC with my kids.  The airport just about pushed me over the edge.  How can so many idiots be in one place at the same time.  And of course, at the airport, they are all mad as hornets due to missed connections and delays.  So they rant and rave and curse at the top of their lungs, causing me to push up the volume on my iPod to drown them out while grinding my teeth in an effort to keep from telling them to shut the heck up.  Places like Arlington Cemetery and the Lincoln Memorial sent me into orbit, too.  At Arlington, I saw a grown, flip flop and dirty t-shirt wearing man dump his hot Pepsi into the grass....ON A GRAVE!  Seriously?  At the Lincoln Memorial, there are signs asking for visitors to show respect and decorum.  Who are they kidding?  I saw a wife shouting directions to her husband to get his finger in the right place so it looked like he was picking Lincoln's nose. C'mon people, have some respect. 

All of these instances over my lifetime\ have caused me to come to the conclusion that I really don't like people.  I like/love my friends.  I love my family (sometimes I don't like them all the time....lol).  But honestly, I can truly take or leave the rest of the population.  Mostly leave. 

Now it seems Brig is experiencing the same symptoms of exasperation and bewilderment when surrounded by people.   Her chief complaint about Girls State was the fact that she was SURROUNDED ALL THE TIME.  And one of the girls in close proximity to her was a hugger. NOOOOOOOOO!   I felt for her.  I get it.  While there is no hope for my son Conor (he decided he doesn't like people many moons ago),  perhaps Brig can turn it around and come out of her teens unscathed and with a positive attitude about her peers and society as a whole.  I'm not going to hold my breath that this will happen, but a girl can dream, right?